tpf. Maria's Place. Return Part 2

[dens_extra_pups]

Continued from here



Maria: Naw. It's better roasted over a fire 'n eaten straight. *to Tikvah* It's that folding thing.

Tikvah: This is a *beepity beep* suitcase!

Terrance: *blinks and goes to help Tikvah, because he's curious*

Maria: I promise, that's the kitchen.

Charleen: *finishes cleaning the snake* Show me where de spices be, 'n I'll show ya how ta cook a snake.

Maria: *chuckles and moves to show Charleen where the spices are*

Tikvah: Quit *beep* playin' with the cat and go get the veggies, Little Girl. *looks toward a low sound* ...You're *beep*ing *beep*ing me. Is that a *beep* cow?

Terrance: Cow? *looks as he sets Pete down*

Maria: That's Red Bull. A farmer down the road had a whole herd'a cows like him, 'n then the old guy died, and his idiot son sold the herd for beef. Red Bull got missed and wandered over here, so now he's mine.

Charleen: *sniffing the spices and eating a pinch of the powdered chili* What you need a bull for, Mama?

Maria: He's a pet.

Charleen: Dis a *beep word* zoo. *heads over to where Tikvah's getting the rocket stove fired up and telling the cat to stop cuddling it and the big bird to stop pulling her shoelace*

Maria: *snerk* 'N you haven't even met Billy, yet. Pete, leave the stove alone.

Terrance: *from the darkness of the garden* What's Billy?

Pete: *runs to Mama*

Maria: She's a red-tailed hawk that never got the message that since she's been rehabilitated, she should avoid humans. *will crouch to scritch Pete's ears*

Pete: *much talk. And then a squeak as his tail gets bit*

Maria: Beeper, leave Pete's tail alone.

Beeper: *scolds as Pete patpats at him, then scoots under the house* *the sound of rapid movement follows*

Charleen: *from where she's frying the snake meat in the bottom of the dutch oven she was given to use* Dat bird got somet'in'.

Maria: Prolly a lizard. Beeper's a roadrunner. And he hasn't learned that he's supposed to be awake during the day and not at night.

Pete: *isn't going under the house to join Beeper. This can mean only one thing*

rattling sound: *confirms that*

Maria: *freezes at the rattling sound*

Tikvah: Snake!

Terrance: *squeak*

Charleen: *puts her stuff down and shoves herself under the house* *the rattling cuts off abruptly as she grouses at the roadrunner to stop pecking her*

Beeper: *excited sounds*

Maria: ... *headshake* Good grief.

Charleen: *makes the house shift and rattle, then stops moving* Somebody pull me out.

Pete: *fur poofed at rattly house*

Billy: *sleepy sounds*

Terrance: Hang on. *sets the veggies he's already gotten down where they won't get trampled, will move to grab Charleen's feet*

Charleen: *pushes as best she can with her hands* Dis house needs t'be higher up.

Maria: *blink* It does?

Terrance: *squeaks and falls backwards as Charleen is freed from beneath the house*

Charleen: *turns and sits up, then reaches to remove the roadrunner that jumped on her head as she came out from under the house* Yeah. Den t'ings wouldn' be livin' under dere no more.

Beeper: *all excited and gleeful, flicking his tail and yakking*

Charleen: He got a pen?

Maria: No, he and Pete usually just run in and outta the house.

Tikvah: You got a crate for the *beep* cat?

Pete: *where cat?*

Maria: ...I think so. *will go into the house to check*

Soundwave: John used an orange box.

Charleen: *looks up from making sure this second snake's dead as Billy fusses and rattles her feathers* Der de odder bird.

Tikvah: *startles and says words about the rustling*

Maria: *back out with orange box* She's mostly friendly.

Tikvah: She nearly made the Little Girl *pee* his *beep* self.

Terrance: No, that was the snake.

Beeper: *ran into the side of the fire pit and is now scolding it and flicking his tail*

Maria: Beeper, leave the *bleeping* fire pit alone! *to Terrance* Veggies?

Terrance: *blink* Oh! *will go get the veggies*

Tikvah: *insults Terrances IQ and ancestry as she finishes getting the kitchen set up and finds the veggie chopping knife*

Terrance: *brings the veggies to the kitchen area*

Maria: *grabs her big, cast iron pan that's survived everything she could come up with to try and break it* *will soon be cooking up the sausage, singing as she works*

Charleen: *stops snake preparation long enough to grab a hyper roadrunner and pop him under the overturned box, then comes back to her project*

Tikvah: *commenting on the sink in the kitchen as she washes the veggies*

Maria: *ignoring the commentary, continues to sing*

Pete: *flops down near the scolding orange box and purrs*

Terrance: *will take the veggies that are washed, the veggie cutting knife, and a cutting board, and set to work getting the veggies nicely chopped*

Tikvah: *tells him not to chop his *beepity* fingers off, and then looks over as Maria reaches the end of that song* There's no kitchen in the *beep* house?

Maria: There used to be, but it was super tiny.

Soundwave: *surprised* You took it out completely?

Maria: It's still there, but I moved it closer to the door, since I mainly use the stuff out here, because there's more room. I remodeled the bathroom area, and now it's all in the bathhouse. I moved Pete's hang-up tunnel inside the house, and I have a hammock chair hanging up inside, too.

Tikvah: *glances at the house* You miss the Big Apple that much?

Charleen: Y'git shacks wit' frillies in de Big Apple?

Maria: It's cozy, and doesn't make me go nuts keeping it clean.

Tikvah: *giving Charleen a look like the bigger woman's crazy* Where the *beep* do you see frillies on that, ya hick?

Maria: *snerk* Prolly the curtains 'n the trim along the eves.

Charleen: Yup. *adding water to her pot*

Maria: *to Tikvah* Besides, all the land the house 'n stuff is on costs less ta rent than a Big Apple apartment the size'a the house.

Tikvah: Lot longer walk to Starbucks, too. *drains the sink and starts washing it out*

Charleen: *snorts. She hates coffee shops*

Maria: *snort* Starbucks burns their beans, so they taste like scrap.

Tikvah: *cheerfully* *beep* hicks.

Maria: Yet you never complain when I make coffee.

Tikvah: *razzes and insults her heritage*

Terrance: *rumbly chuckle* Maria's good at makin' coffee. *will show Maria the vegetables*

Maria: *nods and points to the big soup pot* Put 'em there, Terry.

Terrance: *nods, empties the cutting board's contents into the soup pot, then goes looking for rice, since Charleen's cooking, too*

Soundwave: *quietly, as he comes to stand companionably close but out of the way* You are in the US Army?

Tikvah: Queen K got honourably discharged because the COs were afraid of her. Now she's a guard at the ADX.

Maria: *as she cooks* Hey, Char, they still tellin' the story about how ya busted that lock?

Charleen: Yeah. Can't do dat in dis place, dough. De doors're different.

Soundwave: *curious head tilt*

Maria: Someone was in the Brig at one of our last outposts, 'n Char was on guard duty with me. I went ta get our dinners, 'n I come back, and Char's just standing and scowling at the jerk. Turns out he'd thought he was safe behind the cell door, 'n got lippy. Char busted the lock, trappin' him in the cell.

Tikvah: And then she started talking about fire risk.

Maria: Yup. Our CO laughed himself pukey when he found out.

Soundwave: ... I see. What is ADX?

Tikvah: The United States Penitentiary Administrative Maximum Facility at Fremont County, Colorado.

Soundwave: The super maximum security men's prison.

Tikvah: *smirk* Yup.

Maria: I haven't had any 3 AM calls ta come bail her outta jail, so there's that.

Soundwave: Was that a problem before?

Maria: No. She went straight ta the job after gettin' discharged.

Tikvah: It was a transfer worked out by the higher ups. *peeks in Maria's cooking pot*

Maria: *has sausage, veggies, and some of the butter going*

Charleen: *picks Tikvah up and tosses her out of the way*

Tikvah: *is cussing even before she lands on her feet*

Maria: *snort* *will go get one of the frozen containers of stock that she made the other day*

Charleen: *when she comes back* Called t' let ya know dat Carson decided t' sic 'is dog on me fer laughs.

Maria: *wrinkles her nose at mention of the guard who thinks it's not a woman's job* How's the dog?

Charleen: *snort* I t'rew it at 'im.

Maria: Sheesh.

Charleen: 'N den dat new *beep* tried flingin' sometin' filt'y on me 'n I rubbed 'is nose in it.

Maria: Ew. Did you wash your hands after?

Charleen: Your *aft* fat?

Maria: *bird*

Soundwave: *quietly* Is there a story about the scar on your face?

Charleen: Nahhh.

Tikvah: *bleep* threatened her with a knife, and she took the hit and then snapped his wrist.

Terrance: 'N the jerk's hand's still busted.

Soundwave: How long?

Terrance: *thinking back* Must'a been at least four years ago.

Soundwave: *bluntly* Why are you so hard?

Charleen: *eats some snake and shrugs*

Terrance: We're soldiers.

Maria: We were called the Brute Squad fer a reason.

Tikvah: Hey, remember that first time our carrier hit a mine 'n *beep*ing flipped? *laughs*

Maria: Yup. You *peed* yer pants.

Tikvah: Like *beep*. I waited till the dust settled 'n then...

Terrance: *blushing* Asked for permission to pull down her pants and pee herself with terror.

Tikvah: *laughs much*

Maria: *snerk* Oh, yeah.

Charleen: *laconically* 'N den Little Girl, he done 'n did *pee* hisself.

Maria: Yuuuup

Tikvah: *more laughter* Because he peed him *beep* self laughing, just like the girl he is!

Terrance: *SO much blush* Hey, now...

Tikvah: *flying tackle of the big man she's never been able to knock down*

Terrance: *OOFs, but stays standing* *will fuss over Tikvah and make sure she's not hurt*

Tikvah: *PDA, hahaha*

Charleen: *snorts at them*

Maria: *rolls her eyes and works on making soup* They need ta jes' tie down the chaplain 'n get witnesses.

Soundwave: They are bonded?

Charleen: Fff. Nah. *yummy gravy happening in her pot now*

Terrance: *once he stops flailing, he'll hold Tikvah close and cuddle her happily*

Tikvah: *leans back to frown at him* You're no fun. You don't even wig out anymore.

Terrance: 'Cause I don't gotta worry about you goin' away for a long time anymore.

Tikvah: Whatever. *slight shiver* I'm getting my jacket. You want yours?

Terrance: I'll get mine later.

Tikvah: *snerks and wiggles loose, then runs to the car* Oh yeah. Forgot the cake.

Pete: *looks up from where he's a comfortable floof on top of the box that Beeper is sticking a restless beak through the holes of. Mews quietly at a favourite word*

Maria: *to Pete* Lemme finish makin' dinner, then I'll get you a cake, too.

Pete: *rolls on his back and makes cute paws!*

Soundwave: *leans over the humans to pick Pete up and cuddle his face against the fluffy nut*

Maria: *small smile, gets back to work on soup making*

Pete: *soft paws against the funny car's face, the same way he used to put them against Daddy's face before Daddy got sick and never came back. Much purrrr*

Terrance: Pets are great. *grin*

Maria: Yup. Even when they're bonkers. *chuckles*

Soundwave: You should get one, Terrance.

Tikvah: *as she comes back in a worn army jacket* He's got one. *tosses a little gumby bot at the big man*

Terrance: *cups the bot in his hands once he's caught it* Yeah, I got George. *smile*

Maria: George? *raised brow*

Terrance: Yeah. *will show Maria the light teal, translucent bot*

George: *boogies!*

Tikvah: Do you believe they think *bleep* like that makes a good pet for Armed Forces *beeps*?

Maria: *snerk*

Tikvah: They're special made so they're not a security risk. *razzes George*

George: *moons Tikvah*

Tikvah: ...When the *beep* did you teach him that?

Terrance: The last time the higher-ups had ya away from the unit.

Tikvah: You *beeping* yell at me for doin' that!

Terrance: Teachin' him ta do that made it easier ta wait for ya to come back.

Tikvah: *shakes her head and calls him a suck and other uncomplimentary things*

Terrance: *sweetly* Yeah, but I'm your suck.

Tikvah: *stops cold in mid-insult with a choke, then turns away to hide a blush that wouldn't have shown anyway*

Maria: *snerk* Point ta Terrance.

George: *boogies!*

Charleen: Dis ready. *takes her pot off the stove*

Maria: *will point to where Charleen can take the pot. Which is next to one of the rocks she hauled in to use as seating and beside the cake that Tikvah just set down*

Charleen: *brings the pot over and sets it down, then frowns toward Terrance as he goes to the car* Nobody gonna take yer doll here.

Terrance: I'm gettin' my jacket.

Maria: *snerk* Yeah, right, ya fussbutt.

Tikvah: *sets the rice pan on the stove* The guys on base broke inta his quarters and took Mercy. When he caught up to 'em two 'n a half hours later she was in full regs 'n they didn't wanna give her back.

Maria: Good grief.

Tikvah: He said they were callin' her Terrance, 'n Kosier was bein' me and gettin' up in Woods's face. All I know is I walked into the argument 'n hadta break it up. *snort* Told 'em to get their own *bleep* doll.

Maria: Figures.

Charleen: *moving rocks around and piling some of them together* *snorts companionably at Terrance as he goes by*

Terrance: Least that tone-deaf guy ain't here.

Soundwave: Tone-deaf guy?

Maria: Guy named Jean. Couldn't carry a tune in a bucket if his life depended on it.

Soundwave: Was he one of the men who took your doll?

Terrance: Naw. He was too scared of Tikvah.

Tikvah: *snigger* Nah, he's afraid 'a Rose.

Charleen: *finishes moving rocks and then sits on one and scowls thoughtfully into the darkness*

Maria: *snort* She finally get him in a headlock?

Tikvah: Wedlock. *snerk*

Charleen: *snorts without turning*

Maria: *snickerfitdie* *will check the contents of the pot to see how done they are*

Soundwave: *finishes studying that heap of rocks, and then settles his lanky form down to sit on it* Thank you, Charleen.

Charleen: *snort*

Soundwave: *looks at her for a moment* Maria, have you told them about the pet costume show?

Maria: *more snigger as she gives her pot a stir, and then she comes over to sit on his knee. There will be storytelling, eating, laughing, and remembering throughout the night*

((Written with random_xtras))